Musings From The Heart
An
Essay A Day For A Year
By
Roe
Day
151 May 30, 2012
Religion
As A Crutch Of Happiness
Part
2
People often wonder where
our reverence for spirituality and our faith and need for worship come from.
When we are ready to be born we have a full genetic, instinctual legacy of what
we need to be whole and happy, and of how our Mommies and Daddies are supposed
to Love us, and what they are supposed to provide for us. When we suffer in fear and trauma with our ignorant
and inept parents during hospital births and the moments and hours afterwards,
we virtually die, and our psyches are torn into two pieces so that the memory
of what happened to us, or did not happen us, does not kill us.
Our hearts and minds will
always maintain the pure ideal of what we know we should have received, and how
ideal Mommy and Daddy should have been, and in a sense we will worship these
ideal effigies for our entire lives as the Gods that never were, and as the
Gods that will make everything better if we just believe. What we read in the supposed great religious
texts is simply a very small portion of what our hearts already know and
expected, but never received, and when we read and hear and experience what we
always longed for, we covet and crave and surrender to our own internal loop of
hope. Faith and reverence and worship are our own internal, instinctual ideals,
not greater powers out there to give us peace and comfort. Faith and reverence
are simply the peace and comfort that we will long for our entire lives, but
never actually felt. We will never feel this peace and comfort as long as we
harbor our traumas and deprivations within, and so we believe in false sources
outside of ourselves to falsely give us what we desperately need. We imprinted the need for God and religion
and spiritual practices because we did not imprint the Love we needed from our
Mommies and Daddies.
God and religion and
spirituality of any kind is simply the imprint within our own closed loop
heart-psyche of what we were meant to be and feel, but never did. Human fetuses and newborns are the most
lucent and enlightened creatures on our Earth, and in the universe that we know
of so far. Human fetuses and newborn
infants do not know of God or spirituality, or need God or spirituality, for
they are as close to true oneness and Godliness and being in the moment as any
Moses or Jesus or Mohammed or Buddha could have ever hope to be. We ignorant and inept and traumatized and
deprived parents ruin our babies and children, and we disconnect them from
themselves and their own inner happiness, and we replace the Love we should be giving
them with our silly, invented idealizations of religious ideas, to replace what
we and they possess already in our hearts, but have lost.
If we are going to need
drugs, our drug should be self-realization through healing our own wounded
hearts and psyches, not some false palliative designed to manipulate us as part
of the ignorant masses. Our crutch
should be grieving and mourning our own lost unconscious histories, and we
should lean on regaining our beautiful and pure happiness that we lost as a
result of parents who let us down, parents who believed in false Gods and
practiced useless spiritual practices instead of paying attention to us as
babies and children. We don’t need to
find happiness, for happiness already exists within us. Our happiness has nothing to do with false,
imagined Gods, or any spiritual belief or practice of any kind. Our happiness is simply waiting for us under
the thundercloud of deep psychological and emotion trauma and deprivation, and
our happiness is simply waiting for our unfulfilled childhood needs to be
recognized and grieved.
We should never let our
parents or society dupe us into believing that they are in any way innocent for
what happened to us, and we should never need any other system but our
beautiful own. We must bring home the
knowledge and understanding that we have been deeply hurt by our parents as
babies and children, we have been terribly let down by our parents as infants
and children, and the answer is not to look outside to some invented God or
practice that let our own parents down no differently. Our answer is to trust that we already have
everything we need, we have a loving heart, and we have the desire and the
ability to heal ourselves, and no God or belief or practice can ever help us to
do that. All we need are tears, and deep
grieving for what we should have received.
We should have received Love and understanding from our parents, and
grace and gentility from our parents, approval and freedom from our parents, we
should have received compassion and affection from our parents, and joy and fun
and play from our parents, and not a bunch of subjugating old stories about our
innate human needs, or silly spiritual practices about our innate human needs.
If one can be truly happy
without the drug and crutch of God or spiritual belief systems or faiths or
meditations, then one can be truly happy.
Let faith and spiritual beliefs be just icing on the cake of personal
happiness, not a fake cake to hide the fact that we are deeply unhappy and terrified
to go inwards and face our own tragic truths.
Let us not worship our own God-Dad or fake, virgin mother in the guise
of facing the fact that we did not have the parents that we dreamed of as
children. No person or circumstance can
ever make us happy when we are deeply unhappy inside, especially if we are cut
off from what made us so deeply unhappy inside.
No imagined God or ridiculous lies in old texts, or spiritual practice
will ever help to make us happy, they will always remain as band-aids on deep
childhood wounds. It is time to revere
ourselves because no one ever did, it is time to worship ourselves, because we
were sadly taught selflessness to hide the fact that we were not loved. It is time to have faith in ourselves, for we
possess everything we need to heal and come home to the happiness that is our
birthright.
If there ever was a God, or
a spiritual entity, it is each and every one of us, one by one, individually
and collectively. Look into the eyes of
a healthy, gently birthed newborn, suckling on his or her mother’s breast,
still connected to his or her cord of life, and looking into Mommy and Daddy’s
eyes, and you will see true happiness and Godliness and Peace, and you will see
yourself, or the self that still longs for Love. May we all come home to the real happiness
that we deserve, and may we all give up our religious drugs and our religious
crutches to find our true Love of Self, and our true happiness.
See you tomorrow.
yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com
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