Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Day 136 - Cheat-Hers And Cheat-Hims - Part 1


Musings From The Heart
An Essay A Day For A Year
By Roe
Day 136 May 15, 2012


Cheat-Hers And Cheat-Hims
Part 1


Cheat-Hers are men that have sex with other women while they are in a vow to be sexually and emotionally faithful to their wives or girlfriends, and Cheat-Hims are women that have sex with other men while they are in a vow to be sexually and emotionally faithful to their husbands or boyfriends.  “Cheaters” are the ones in the relationship who violate the rules and agreements of the relationship, and cheaters are the liars and deceivers and perpetrators. “Victims” are the ones in the relationship who are cheated on, and the ones that feel and are seen as the innocent ones and the victims of the infidelity.  It seems that cheaters are to blame for the transgression of infidelity, but in fact each party, perpetrator and victim, are no more or no less than 50% guilty or 50% innocent each for the act of infidelity.  Cheaters are victims of their partners leaving them unfulfilled and unhappy and frustrated, and cheating is simply a tit for tat of anger and punishment against the partner that has let the cheater down.  Infidelity and cheating are devastating and very complicated symbiotic acts of rebellion and retaliation and revenge between members of a couple, and both persons, cheater and victim, are equally involved and responsible for the tit for tat of cheating and its aftermath.
No person ever cheats on another person in a vacuum, meaning cheating is impossible without motive, and without unhappiness and disenchantment and frustration on the part of the cheater. No cheating is possible without the perverse joy of rebellion and revenge of the cheater, and the playing out of psycho-sexual and primal trauma felt as a sexual fetish on the part of the cheater.  No cheating is possible unless the victim is equally responsible to provide the motive, unless the victim is equally at fault for the unhappiness and disenchantment and frustration of the cheater, and no cheating is possible unless the perpetrator and victim symbiotically fit into the psycho-sexual and primal sexual fetish pattern of perpetrator-victim. It is clear that cheaters are liars and deceivers, but the victims of cheaters are liars and deceivers also, for they lie to themselves and their partners and others about their failure to sexually and emotionally satisfy their partners, and admit and correct their serious sexual and emotional problems and unhappinesses and disenchantments and frustrations in the relationship that provokes cheating, and fuels the cheater and ultimately the pain of the victim.
Both cheater and victim in a couple are equally guilty of many violations of the rules and agreements and vows of the relationship leading up to a cheating.  Sexual infidelity is of course a sexual act, and the key words are sexual and infidelity.  When a couple is brand new and in Love, the couple is also sexually bonded and connected, sexually fun and fulfilling, sexually very active, and let’s hope, sexually interesting and exciting, and just plain sexually hot.  No man or woman in a relationship has the motive or intent to cheat when they are sexually bonded to their partners, and when they are sexually connected to their partner. No woman or man in a relationship has the need or desire to cheat when they are having fun and fulfilling sex often with their partners, no partner in a couple wants to cheat when they are sexually very active, when sex is interesting and exciting, and no person would ever think of cheating when sex with the person that they are in love with is hot, hot, hot. The victim of infidelity is guilty of the violation of the vows and agreements of the relationship by not sexually and emotionally satisfying their partners, and by not doing their part to maintain a sexual and emotional relationship that is active and exciting and hot.
When a person cheats, the cheater and the new lover become the beneficiaries of sexual bonding and sexual connection, they have sexual fun that is fulfilling, they are sexually active, their sex is interesting and exciting, and “hot” returns to the lifestyle of the cheater.  This is in part the motive of the cheater, but this is the direct pleasure and thrill only.  The hidden motive and agenda, and perverse pleasure, is to rebel against the victim of cheating, to punish the victim of cheating, and to challenge the victim of cheating to wake up and realize that they are failing in their sexual and emotional responsibility to their partners.  This is no justification or excuse for a person who is expressing rage and frustration in a relationship to lie and deceive and avenge by cheating, it is simply a tit for tat to express to the victim that they have failed to be sexually interesting and sexually fun and fulfilling, and sexually hot.  It is devastating to the victim of infidelity to realize and admit that there is someone else that has sexually bonded and connected with their partners.  It is indescribably painful to the victim to realize and admit that their partner has found someone more sexually fun and fulfilling, more sexually active, more sexually interesting and exciting, but most importantly, sexually hotter. 
Women are fiercely rivalrous, and when the woman victim of infidelity finds out that her man is sexually with another woman it is incredibly threatening, with survival instinct and hereditary legacy going back millions of years. When she finds out that the ”other” woman is sexually better, and sexual more often, she is outraged, she loses face,  her pride is hurt, and her female indignation goes off the scale.  This is the very result that is so delicious for the cheating man, and where the fetish of cheating really lies.  Cheating is the ultimate “fuck you”, and most audacious wake-up call and challenge to the sexually inferior and unfulfilling partner.  The woman with the relationship vows is caught in the false religious and societal paradigm of the supposed “good woman” and “good mother”, which is an invented notion regarding sexuality, and she behaves accordingly to maintain her respect.  The new lover has no such vow or investment yet, and her weapon against the wife or girlfriend is full fledged dark sexuality in the form of promiscuous, no holes barred sex, to outperform the wife or girlfriend of the man.  The slut or the man stealer is the most devastating woman in the world to the wife or girlfriend trying to maintain a respectable and honorable standard to her man, and the man who is unfaithful uses this double standard of his against his trustworthy woman by doing with other women what he would not tolerate with his wife or girlfriend.  This double dealing of his own double standard is infuriating to women, and by his challenge and slap in the face he unleashes the infamous wrath of the infamous scorned woman and abandoning woman.
Men are fiercely rivalrous, and when the man victim of infidelity finds out that his woman is sexually with another man it is incredibly threatening, with survival instinct and hereditary legacy going back millions of years. When he finds out that the ”other” man is sexually better, and sexual more often, he is outraged, he loses face,  his pride is hurt, and his defensive aggression and hurt goes off the scale.  This is the very result that is so delicious for the cheating woman, and where the fetish of cheating really lies.  Cheating is the ultimate “fuck you”, and most audacious wake-up call and challenge to the sexually inferior and unfulfilling male.  The man with the relationship vows is caught in the false religious paradigm of the supposed “good man” and “good father”, which is an invented notion regarding sexuality, and he behaves accordingly.  The new lover has no such vow or investment yet, and his weapon against the husband or boyfriend is full-fledged dark sexuality in the form of promiscuous, no holes barred sex to outperform the husband or boyfriend of the woman.  The asshole or the woman user is the most devastating man in the world to the husband or boyfriend trying to maintain a respectable and honorable standard to her woman, and the woman who is unfaithful uses this double standard of hers against her trustworthy man by doing with other men what she would not tolerate with her husband or boyfriend.  This double dealing of her own double standard is infuriating to men, and by her challenge and slap in the face she unleashes the infamous aggressive and physically punishing male and abandoning male.

To be continued tomorrow in part 2

See you tomorrow.


yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com

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