Day 102 - The Slut - The Most Formidable Power In HIstory - Part 2

Musings From The Heart

An Essay A Day For A Year

By Roe

Day 102 April 11, 2012

The Slut – The Most Formidable Power In History

Part 2

   Pain is Love that is hurt, and hate is Love that is angry.  Dark sex is Love that is a child that is hurting, and grew up, and is now acting out this pain as pleasure.  When any man participates in sex with any Woman, no matter how elevated or degrading, he shares a kind of intimacy with Her, and Love is present in one way or another, light or dark.  The Slut is the “good woman’s” worst nightmare, for if the mutual dark exchange of hatred between Mr. SLUT SEX and Ms. SLUT SEX turns to elevating feelings, then Love is converting back to light, and “Mrs. Good” is dead, and she knows it.  “She meant nothing to me”, only can barely save a struggling “good”relationship with infidelity, and the jilted Woman must know of any emotional entanglement on the elevating side with her rival.   “She sucks and fucks like a Slut honey, better than you!, AND she Loves me better than you too!”  Is the death knell of any Woman who thought she had any man, and any Woman fears exactly this, as she is equally capable of this with any man.  Any woman who has ever made eyes at a man who already has a woman, or fucked him, or loved him, or has stolen him, or married him, is by exact definition a Slut, and Mr.,  as we already established, is by genetic makeup and historical precedent, a slut. We see ourselves in all others, and the “good woman” fears all Sluts, with her man who is a slut, because she too knows and understands her own Slut very well.

    The dark and dirty and sloven man-slut and man-whore is a raging woman “hater”, and he self loathes by loathing Her, (his mother), and self degrades by degrading her self and body in order to debase and degrade and destroy himself through the degradation and denigration of what he needs and covets and desires most, his precious “mommy”, his precious “princess”, his precious “feminine”,  his precious “she body”, his precious “lover”, and his precious “wife”.  When the Slut throws herself down for him, or allows him to throw her down, she lures him, she uses him, she is angry at him, she rages at him, she hates him, and she destroys him, and it gives him sexual, eroticized pleasure to use her, to be angry at her, to rage at her, to hate her, and to destroy her. He is defending himself from his own childhood pain regarding his Mother, and enjoying it on and with another Woman, and the Slut is defending herself from her own childhood pain regarding her father, and she is enjoying it on and with another man.  And mortally for any “good woman” rival, the Slut can possess him and marry him any time she wants to, all she has to do is surrender to him and love him.  He deeply desires this without knowing it consciously, and he wants to convert his pain regarding her, his anger and rage and disappointment and hurt, to redemption and Love, and happily ever after.  This is the healing desire of every little boy child, and he is extremely vulnerable to the power of the Slut-Sex-Woman that surrenders her dark side to him, and then Loves him, and then changes to a “good woman” only for him.  The original “good woman” is terrified of the Slut and this conversion process of her angry man into a redeemed boy in Love.

   In truth, a Woman is not a Slut like a man is, for She produces only one egg each month, and it is designed for the ultimate man, and only one man, and forever and ever and ever.  She has no intention of being promiscuous, or base, or subjugated, or denigrated, or used, or slurred, or angered at or hated by men, for in fact she is still looking for that one man, that perfect man, that man that she will give her Love to, and her egg to, forever and ever.  The woman Slut uses her promiscuous and prolific and base SEX in anger and hatred at men (at her father), to debase and disrespect herself to punish men (her father), and steal men from Women and punish Women (her mother), this is clear, but the woman Slut is SEX as a test to weed out the mutually hating and hateful men, and to search for and find her one and true man that she will surrender her Love and eggs to forever.  .  This is the healing desire of every little girl child, and she has the power of the poor man that loves her as She is, and then turns to a “good man” only for her. 

   The woman Slut is a decoy for foolish men that get off on using and hating her, while she gets off on being used and hating them, all the while hoping to redeem him and convert him to her one and only boy prince lover for her and only her.  The female Slut is the ultimate test of men and man, and the “good woman” is forever terrified that some dumb, dirty Slut (and she good woman knows that there is no such thing), will succeed in sucking and fucking her man, and he will pass her test and Love her, and she will pass his test and Love him, and in this process she will lose him to the Slut-turned-lover-wife, perhaps no differently than she also was a Slut-turned-lover-wife in her life, or in her potentiality, conscious or unconscious.

   In truth female Sluts and Whores are man haters, and they do not surrender to men in heart or self at all, as a matter of fact they deny the man what he really needs and wants, and in the process he enrages sexually and takes SEX from her in a base and degrading way.  Sluts make themselves available to men like self loathing and seemingly worthless slabs of meat with three holes in them, and in fact dirty men do dirty deeds to the Slut who does virtually nothing.  The Slut does not have a clue how to please a man, and does not know how to suck or fuck or give or perform any better than the most sexually inept girlfriend or sexually inept wife. It is a ridiculously mistaken historical legend and completely false that Sluts and Whores are good in bed, unless the man too is a seemingly pathetic slab of self loathing meat with two holes in it, and doesn’t know what good in bed is. The femme fatale is simply a hateful pin cushion who leaves men to do the deed as a hateful taker.  Man sluts are Woman haters, and they do not have a clue how to please a woman or make her happy, they just take for themselves what they think is hot or sexy or dirty or slutty, and the man hating Slut sits back and receives and laughs at his ridiculous and shallow folly.  “Fuck you!”  And then, “Fuck you back!”  The danger for all women who have a man is when “fuck you” turns to “I accept you” or “I respect you” or “I really like you”.  

   Go to any strip club and you will find hundreds and thousands of men who sit there and gawk and gasp and froth at the mouth, with expressions on their faces like lost school boys in love. And when you ask them to voice this child-like longing into words, while they have a raging erection, they exclaim, “why you fucking slut!” Men love to hate the women that they wish they could love, and the danger is that they will succeed in sexually having her, and in the process he will truly love her, and while she is hating back and getting off on taking this man from another woman, while enraging her own man, that she too will love him.  This is the ultimate power of the Woman, to successfully steal a man from another woman, and enrage all men in the process except the one and only that protects and keeps her.

   Women are the most powerful forces in the world.  We men need her so badly, for without her life ceases to matter and even exist.  We will do anything for the right her, and we most certainly do, each and every day around the globe, for the last many, many millions of years.  As long as men have SEX and erections, the Slut is the most powerful of all women, and every woman knows never to underestimate any other woman.  Every woman knows to be terrified and defensive of a Slut, for her man is simply a big, dumb, angry and needy little boy fish, and the the Slut is the most amazing and delectable bait on the planet. When the Slut ascends to Lover and Wife and Queen and Goddess, all other Women are dead, and all other men are in heaven if it is they who possess her and SEX with her.  Hail to the power of Woman, and extreme caution when she enrages and emerges as Slut.  She is the most powerful force on the planet.

See you tomorrow.

www.dear-roe-the-muse.com

yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com

Day 101 - The Slut - The Most Formidable Power In History

Musings From The Heart

An Essay A Day For A Year

By Roe

Day 101 April 10, 2012

The Slut – The Most Formidable Power In History

Part 1

      The most powerful force in our world, is the Woman.  Woman is Mother, Woman is Lover, Woman is Wife, and Woman is Mother once again.  Woman is the very cycle of Life and Love, from a man’s own mother, to the mother of a man’s children.  Every man is beholding to her in coveting, in need, in use, and also in unhappiness and in hate. The most powerful man that has ever lived in history, was admittedly less powerful than the lowliest woman, for he desires Her, he needs Her, and he cannot live without Her, in one way or another.  She as Woman and Mother, and Lover, and Wife, knows this, and She wields her power over and under and around him so as to guide and govern him and his world through Her.  The most powerful force in our world, is the Woman

   The most powerful woman in the world, is the Slut.  The highest and most powerful Woman in history, then and now, deeply fears the lowliest Slut.  The Slut, as a “dirty and sloven and immoral woman”, is the most powerful “man lure” in our world.  The Slut is the consummate man lurer, man user, man manipulator, man destroyer, man stealer, man lover, and man marrier.  Every Woman hates and fears the Slut, and even every Slut hates and fears the “other” Slut.  Every man in the world, without exception, Loves the Slut, Loves to need and want and covet the Slut, Loves to use the Slut, Loves to subjugate and denigrate and slur and  hate the Slut.  Every man in the world loves to fuck the Slut. Any man that does not know or admit this, is prime folly for himself and his “good woman”, and for the Slut, and is the most vulnerable to the power of the Slut. No man or “good woman” can escape her.

   Every man in our world, without exception, harbors some degree of anger and rage and disappointment at the Mother, at the feminine, and at Woman, whether he is conscious of it or not.  This is as a result of a traumatic gestation inside of his own Mother, a horrific and death defying birth from his own Mother, and a traumatic and deprived babyhood and early childhood as a result of an inadequate or unhealthy or abusive or abandoning Mother, to one degree or another.  There has never been in history anywhere near an ideal Mother for any son or man.  Every transgression or failure by Mother is registered in the heart and psyche of every boy and man, as disappointment, anger, rage, and hurt.  This is perfectly normal, and absolutely commonplace in every son and his Mother, in every man and his Woman, to one degree or another. 

    All humans have infant trauma and deprivation and unfulfilled needs, to one degree or another. Infant and childhood trauma and deprivations and unfulfilled needs are felt and expressed, and lived out through our adult sexuality.  Adult sexuality is a formidable defense system from infant and childhood pain. This is totally normal, and absolutely unavoidable.

   The Woman as chaste and honorable represents to a man the light side of loving Her, and She is Lover and Wife, and Mother.  The Woman as dirty and immoral represents to a man the dark side of loving Her, and She is Slut and Whore, and ironically, and every so dangerously, also potentially Lover and Wife, and Mother.  The “good” woman for a man is a vessel to place in her all that is respectful and honorable, and valuable, and she is the “marrying kind”, and “the mother of his children”.  The man compliments and elevates and well treats the good woman to show his happiness and pleasure with her. The “bad” woman for a man is a vessel to place in her all that is disrespectful and dishonorable, and without value.  She is not the marrying kind, or the Mother of his children.  The man sexually insults and sexually degrades and sexually mistreats the bad Woman to show his anger and rage and hatred and unhappiness and pain with Her.

      Every Woman in our world, without exception, harbors some degree of anger and rage and disappointment at the Father, at the masculine, and at man, whether she is conscious of it or not.  This is as a result of a traumatic gestation inside of her own Mother vis a vis a man, a horrific and defying birth vis a vis a man, and traumatic and deprived babyhood and early childhood as a result of an inadequate or unhealthy or abusive or abandoning father, to one degree or another.  There has never been in history anywhere near an ideal father for any daughter or Woman.  Every transgression or failure by father is registered in the heart and psyche of every girl and Woman, as disappointment, anger, rage, and hurt.  This is perfectly normal, and absolutely commonplace in every daughter and her father, in every Woman and her man, to one degree or another. 

   The dark and dirty and sloven Slut and Whore is a raging man “hater”, and she self loathes and self degrades her own self and body in order to debase and degrade and destroy “him” (her father) through the degradation and denigration of what he needs and covets and desires most, his precious “mommy”, his precious “princess”, his precious “feminine”,  his precious “she body”, his precious “lover”, and his precious “wife”.  When the Slut throws herself down for a man, or allows him to throw her down, she lures him, she uses him, she is angry at him, she rages at him, she hates him, and she destroys him.  It gives her sexual pleasure to go down for him, and to take him down. And mortally for any “good woman” rival, she can possess him and marry him any time she wants to, all she has to do is surrender to him and Love him.  Every “good woman” knows this, for she has the Slut inside of Her too, and she know what she and all women are capable of.

   The Slut is female Sex, and for a man the Slut IS SEX. A man is technically and in truth the true slut.  A man produces 1-5 billion sperm every 2-8 hours, 365 days a year, for a hundred years.  A man can mount a female and ejaculate inside her and any other her, and lots of hers, without a thought, anytime, anyplace, and in any way, any time he wants to, and come home for dinner with nothing more than a feeling of conquest and relief, if his heart is not engaged in a healthy way by any one female.  A man is a wanton breeding machine, and in fact is designed by Nature to impregnate as many females as often as he can, and he carries a billion years of this legacy in his biology, in his testicles, and in his psyche.  The man is the true slut by design, and the incredibly promiscuous and perverse sexual practices in the gay community, man to man, where there is no female, exemplify this biological and physiological and historical fact.  Man IS SEX. Since a man expresses his pain through his sex, the man expresses his pain in sex, as embodied SEX, and with the female Slut, who is a Woman embodied as SEX.  An angry and virile man (all men to one degree or another), and an angry and libidinous Slut, (all women to one degree or another) are a perfect match, and the “good woman” fears this, his SEX with the Slut’s SEX. 

To be continued tomorrow in part 2

See you tomorrow.

www.dear-roe-the-muse.com

yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com

  

Day 100 - Our Beautiful Negative Feelings

Musings From The Heart

An Essay A Day For A Year

By Roe

Day 100 April 9, 2012

Our Beautiful Negative Feelings

   Human beings are very advanced creatures.  If you dissect the human brain, you will find three distinct parts, the retarded part, the foolish part, and the stupid part.  If you put all three of these parts together, you come up with nuclear warfare.  Ok, I’m just kidding.  But it is facetiously true. The three distinct parts of the human brain are the reptilian brain, at the bottom of our brain and top of the neck, which is the oldest part of our brain, and next, in the middle, the limbic or feeling brain, which is newer and more advanced than the reptilian, and lastly, like a toupee glued on top, the cerebral cortex, the most advanced part and newest part of our brain, our thinking brain.  Without each of the three parts of our brain working properly and together, we become vegetables.

   Human beings are in fact emotional creatures, before we are thinking creatures.  Our reptilian brain handles all of our autonomous functions, things like our breathing and heart pumping and digestion, and even large parts of our other bodily functions like our evacuation and sexuality and birthing.  We can all go on living without worrying about what our reptilian brain is doing. It is called our reptilian brain because even the most primitive reptiles have this brain, and so does every mammal, they are not so different from our own.  We are then in actuality “limbic” or feeling, and this middle brain, the emotional brain, functioned many, many millions of years before the first human thought. Even today, with our fancy cortex, by the time we have a thought, it is long after the emotion that triggered the thought.  All emotions happen whether we want them to or not, and whether we ask for them or not, and our knowledge of our emotions happens afterwards.  Our thoughts are merely responses to emotions. Our thoughts try and control our emotions, and the experiences of our emotions, but our emotions have already happened by the time we think of them.  Humans are emotional creatures that think and act upon emotions.

   Our “selves” or “hearts” are in actuality limbic, or feeling.  We are what we emote, and our thinking brain is a response to our feeling.  Our cerebral cortex is like a very sophisticated tool box or computer at the service of our selves or heart, and we are meant to “respond” in rational thought and “act” on issues of the heart.  When people become disconnected from the original “heart”, from the heart self of Love and kindness, from compassion and empathy, from the checks and balances systems of shame and guilt, and doubt, and regret, things like genocide and nuclear warfare emerge, and this time I am not joking.  We humans have largely lost connection with our true loving-heart selves, and of our natural ability to emote from our original state of Love and perfection. Part of this is our ridiculous, inherited religious beliefs that lead us to believe that we are inherently flawed, and born into sin. When we are conceived, we have the potentiality of emoting perfectly from and with Love, and then thinking and acting from and with Love.  When we suffer from terrible emotional and psychological trauma and deprivation in the womb and during birth, and in early childhood, and when we have unfulfilled needs, our ability to “feel” appropriately from our limbic selves, and then “think”, and “act” appropriately, becomes warped and skewed and amnesiatic.  In terms of the survival of a species, we become actually violent, and eventually suicidal on a species level. We are not inherently flawed or born into sin at all, that is religious crap written for the sake of manipulating ignorant people. We create our own flaws and defects as parents who harm innocent children, deliberately or ignorantly.   There is no such thing as sin unless we accept our subjugation by sick people and their sick doctrines.  Our hearts already contain the true meter of what is right and true and just and moral.

   Our limbic brain has a stop gap, and checks and balances, and emergency protection system designed to protect ourselves and others and our species, and that is the feelings of shame, and guilt, and regret, responsibility, and remorse.  We feel these as negative feelings, but they are in fact the most important feelings that Love has ever designed, and they are designed to help us remain aligned in Love.  When we stray from our natural heritage and inheritance of Love, we feel shame, we feel guilt, we feel regret, we feel responsibility, and we feel remorse. When we feel these feelings, and when we use our formidable, top of the line super computer, called our cerebral cortex, to limit our behavior, or to correct our transgressions and errors, Love remains as an ideal and a reality. When we are traumatized and deprived by our parents and the paradigm of our society, our natural checks and balances system becomes faulty or inoperative.  When the feelings of shame, guilt, regret, responsibility and remorse do not come, or if we fail to act upon them, we fail ourselves, we fail others, we fail Life, and we fail Love.

  The first “order of business” when we feel or act inappropriately, is to have natural feelings of shame, guilt, regret, responsibility, and remorse.  Next, is to admit shame, admit guilt, admit regret, admit responsibility, and admit remorse.  When our reptile-limbic-cortex self realizes and admits these negative emotions, we can then limit our behavior and actions so as not to feel this way. If we have to throttle and restrain or suppress our natural emotional response, we must make a note that we are not feeling in a natural loving way because we are unhealthy, for if we emoted naturally and healthily we would not have to be managing our emotions.

   If in fact we are retarded, foolish, or stupid enough to behave humanly (not humanely), and create neutron bombs to annihilate our species, we have our natural safety mechanism of these negative emotions to lead us to admit our folly and destroy them and apologize to all humanity forever.  (Or any other behavior or transgression that runs contrary to our hearts).  The problem is when we do transgress our hearts and Love, and do not even feel shame, or guilt, or regret, or responsibility, or remorse. This is called human psychosis, and unfortunately we are living in a time, since primordial single celled creatures, of the potentiality of global psychosis, where we do not even feel the folly of our follies, and where we simply hurt people that hurt us, because we are hurt like everyone else, and not feel or realize or admit it.  This is fine in terms of survival when our spear reaches 100 meters, but not when our spear is named ICBM. 

  Let us please honor and welcome and appreciate and be grateful for the feelings of shame,  guilt, regret, responsibility, and remorse.  They are our own personal, emotional friends, and in effect they are us.  They are the feelings of oopses and ouches and oh-nos of our own selves, and they are meant to be the sacred saviors of our selves, saviors of the ones we love and don’t love, and saviors of our world and species. Here, here! to feeling these beautiful, negative feelings, for now we may self examine, we may self accept, we may self heal, and we may self Love.  And when we self Love, we self survive.  I am all for surviving as a self and as a species.  How about you?

See you tomorrow.

www.dear-roe-the-muse.com

yourpersonalmuse@gm.com

Day 99 - Ecstatic Birth - Part 8

Musings From The Heart

An Essay A Day For A Year

By Roe

Day 99 April 8, 2012

Ecstatic Birth Part 8

The Day Of Ecstatic Birth Baby

   Today is the day that Baby is coming!  Yippee!  Today is the day of celebration, and the greatest day of celebration ever!  Birth Mommy and Daddy have everything ready since long ago, they have the ideal, romantic birth cave ready, they have wonderful music and food and drink ready, and they are so excited.  Mommy is as ready for this wonderful day as an Olympic athlete, she is in peak cardio-vascular physical condition, she is limber and supple like a child from all her stretching, she is well nourished and hydrated, and most of all she is feeling harmonious from all her great, daily sex and relaxing orgasms with Hubby. Mommy has expert control over her vaginal muscles, from vice like constricting, to complete, gaping relaxation.  Mommy feels confident and hopeful, and deeply trusts herself that she will be the best birther in the world!  Birth Daddy is the happiest birth caddy-daddy in the world, Mommy is the golfer, and Daddy eagerly and affectionately follows her like an eager caddy from stage to stage, always beaming confidence and support. Daddy feels deeply trusting of his beautiful lady and his coming Baby!  Mommy and Daddy to be are so well prepared, so well educated, and so ready for their ecstatic, solo, unassisted birth, just the way perfect Mother Nature intended, and prepared them both for in the last billion years.

   As we know after 7 essays, it is Baby who is the birth maestro, and all Mommy has to do is get out of her own way, and stop being Mrs. Know-It-All, or Mrs. I’m-So-Helpless.  All Mommy has to do is surrender to her birth pain, and the loveliest drug in the world will get her and baby high, her own birth endorphins. Baby is very, very happy, but Baby is feeling very cramped, and really must get out! Baby is the most perfect and omniscient creature in the universe, and Baby’s lucidity will perfectly guide his or her own beautiful ecstatic birth. Soon into labor, Mommy will turn into a panting, glassy eyed kitty and bunny and sheep, and when we wave our hand in front of her eyes, in the loveliest ecstatic-birth way, “no one is home”, Mommy and baby are in their psychic and subliminal birth trance.

   At the perfect moment and time, and in the perfect place, soon Baby’s head will crown, or Baby’s feet will protrude, and Baby is almost here! (Breech birth is completely normal and safe and routine in gentle, ecstatic births).  The actual emergence into Life outside the womb, and the converting of umbilical Life to air breathing Life is absolutely critical.  The emergence of Baby’s head may be the only part of the entire birth that Birth Mommy later reports as uncomfortable, as the crowning and emergence of Baby’s head often stings for just a bit.  Baby is usually born in the next contraction, but there is no rush or worry since Baby is still living off of the umbilical cord.  There are clear signs if there are problems with Baby or the cord or Mommy, and Mommy and Daddy are well educated to know how things are going.

   When Baby is born, Mommy is the first to touch Baby, she simply reaches down or reaches back and cradle-catches her own child. It is absolutely imperative that Mommy brings Baby immediately to her warm, naked, beautiful body, with the cord intact.  Mommy is now orgasmically happy and relieved, and she often convulses with ecstatic, giddy joy, or ecstatic tears.  This is Mommy’s defining moment, and the most important and impactful and happiest moment of her life. Mommy is Goddess, and Life giver, and the center and pinnacle of the universe. At this moment there is no one but Goddess and her child.  Mommy should use her mouth and suck out the nasal passages gently and with love if she feels that it is necessary, just like kitty and bunny, and Mommy instinctually knows what to do, and any reluctance that she may feel in her normal state to the primordial mammalian mother ritual is long forgotten, for at this moment Mommy is She Panther and She Wolf.  With the beauty of underwater births, Baby emerges with clean and clear breathing passages, and largely washed and ready to open his or her eyes.  If there is no birth tub, Mommy can lick the eyes of Baby to clear them if it feels natural, and Mommy keeps Baby very warm, and she gently pets and admires her miracle child.

   When Baby makes the transition from umbilical cord to lung breathing, Baby may experience a burn in the trachea, and this is often the only crying from a gentle birth.  Mommy gently holds her child, and comforts him or her in this very important and often scary transition. Most importantly, Mommy knows to search for and embrace eyes and heart with Baby. Baby can see optically-psychically perfectly, and  Baby and Mommy now meet for the first time as mutually sentient creatures.  Baby now “downloads” and “imprints” his or her maternal progenitor.  This is the most important moment in all of our lives, the first moment that “actuality” is contrasted with the “potentiality” bliss of Mommy’s perfect womb.  Now Mommy can relax, and enjoy Baby, and Baby can enjoy Mommy.  Now Mommy can introduce Daddy, and with warm hands and loving eyes, Daddy and Baby can embrace eyes and hearts for the first time, and now Baby downloads and imprints “the other half” of Life, the paternal progenitor.  Lights are kept to candle lit low, soft music is playing, the same music that Mommy and Daddy have been playing to Baby in the womb for nine months, and voices are kept low and to a minimum.  Of course there is no one else in the room with Mommy and Daddy and Baby during the first hour at least.

  Mommy may now offer her nipple to Baby gently, as it is important for Baby to suckle as soon as possible.  It is not important to be concerned about cleaning Baby, or ever weigh or measure or move Baby from his or her ideal position on Mommy’s breast, and Baby must always have glowing visibility of Mommy’s face. Daddy can now aid Mommy in Mommy’s second birth, the birth of the placenta.  In an ecstatic, natural, gentle birth, the cord is never cut.  Mommy is busy with adoring Baby and Baby is enraptured with adoring Mommy.  In another contraction or two the placenta emerges, and Daddy wraps it lovingly into a special cloth that he has ready, and places it on Mommy’s tummy.  Much later when Baby can be lovingly bathed, the placenta too can be lovingly washed and cleaned.  Baby is never clothed in the first hours and days of after birth, but lives on and with Mommy naked, skin to skin with Mommy, who is also naked.  In the brief moments when Mommy and Baby are separated, so Mommy can move around and focus on her own needs, Baby is simply wrapped in beautiful and soft cloth.  Baby’s placenta is lovingly packed in herbs and salt, and wrapped up in a ceremonious cloth, and for the next few days, carried around with Baby until the cord dries up, and then separates naturally from Baby at the belly button.  Mommy and Daddy now have a beautiful ceremony with Baby where the placenta is planted in the ground with a beautiful flower or tree over it, in thanks for it’s miraculous effort in growing Baby.  In biological and psychic actuality, Mommy is the Mommy of the Placenta, as she grows the Placenta, and the Placenta is the Mommy of the Baby.  That is how Baby feels it psycho-psychic-emotionally-physically, and it causes severe birth trauma to “cut” the cord, especially when the cord is still alive and full of a large portion of Baby’s blood.

   The first few seconds and minutes and hours and first day for Baby are ideal, they are warm, skin to skin, they are quiet and peaceful, and there is a minimum of moving around, and of unnecessary cleaning and organizing and logistics, and unnecessary showing off of Baby to other people.  Baby is the most priceless and precious Stratovarious violin, the most delicate and precise Swiss watch in history, and the most exquisite and fragile Ming vase in the world. Baby is a living and breathing masterpiece of Love, and the most sentient and omniscient creature in the universe.  Womb life and birth and the first few seconds and minutes and hours and days for Baby are the most impactful and Life supporting or Life destroying for Baby and us all, and so every moment and every move is on behalf of the next Loving Prodigy of Life, and Baby’s beginning is ideal, which makes for a beautiful and romantic and grateful ideal Love sharing for Mommy and Daddy. 

   Congratulations to ecstatic birth Mommy and ecstatic birth Daddy on your surrender to trusting yourselves and trusting your newborn Baby, and trusting Life and Love and Nature.  All of you, and our world,  will be forever rewarded.

www.dear-roe-the-muse.com

yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com

Day 98 - Feeling Down And Unhappy - Depression Part 2

Musings From The Heart

An Essay A Day For A Year

By Roe

Day 98 April 7, 2012

Feeling Down And Unhappy

Depression Part 2

   When a person feels depression they feel down and unhappy, like I felt yesterday and wrote about in part 1. When a person feels this way chronically, we say that they are chronically depressed.  In medicine and psychology, depression is considered a recognizable illness, and a depressed person is “suffering”, and needs care.  I say that depression is completely normal, and simply a very clever defensive mechanism for children.  I would never discount that a depressed person suffers or needs care, but I would like to add an unusual ray of hope for people suffering from depression:  You are very, very well, and you should be proud of yourself for having a very sound and successful defense system, and for surviving your life to this place and time! Congratulations and touché to all persons suffering from “depression”.  Now the second unusual ray of hope for the “depressed”:  Yes, you may be called  “sick”, and yes you have an “ill-ness”, and yes you may need psycho-emotional therapy, but you are closer than you think to a happy life without depression. Ironically, you are closer to healing tears than virtually any other sufferer, once you truly choose to work towards deactivating the defense of depression.

   A person suffering from depression, like all of us, is coping with insurmountable psychological an emotional trauma and deprivation and unfulfilled needs from the womb and birth and early childhood.  Some survivors of womb abuse and birth abuse and child abuse (which is all of us), become over achievers, some go into blocking and denial, others become counter culture rebels or evangelists or believers or practitioners of this or that, others become criminals, others go insane or commit suicide, or go off to war, or become drunks and addicts or gamblers or insatiable “holics” of one kind or another.  Most of us cope by living unfulfilled lives of drinking and promiscuity, and self denigration and self loathing, and live quiet lives of banality or mediocrity and self limitation.  The person suffering from chronic depression is the most obvious of sufferers, and in theory the easiest to reach and help, if the defense of feeling depressed can be “unlocked” and reversed.

   The person suffering from depression clearly feels down and unhappy, and clearly can benefit from deep mourning and deep grieving, and learning to feel tears and rage and all other emotions “stuck” in depression, which is the only way for any and all people to heal. The feeling of “depression” is  the correct and natural and healing feeling of feeling down and hurt and traumatized and deprived and abused and damaged and disappointed and neglected and unloved and feeling powerlessness and hopelessness is part of the need to grieve and cry, or have a healing and cathartic feeling.  But on the way to “have” the feeling, on the way to the actual processing of the pain, this necessary path to healing gets “stuck”.  In fact the depressed person is using the process of grieving and mourning ironically in reverse as a defense, instead of as the healing process.  The depressed person is a chronic and professional mourner and griever and moper and stuck and feeling down sufferer, so that they don’t actually feel, and also to elicit a kind of negative attention from others.

  A depressed person is, as we say in English, is  “caught between a rock and a hard place”, or in Spanish, “between the sword and the wall”.  And this “caught” and “stuck” feeling is the “fetish” of the depressed person, not unlike gambling for some, porn for others, over achieving or others, and a myriad of other “negative pleasures” that function to keep our feelings at bay. Chronic depression is like a kind of chronic masturbation, a constant “down-ness” in a constant self martyrdom, as a method to elicit self pity and pity from others, but never feel or heal or progress towards healing.  Depression is simply a very effective defense system, designed to successfully protect the child from imminent threat, while also appease very sick parents. Chronically depressed persons have the hardest time of all to recognize and admit catastrophic womb abuse, virtually deadly births, and severe emotional and psychological child abuse at the hands of their own parents.  Very sick parents, usually both, and very sick childhood environments cause chronically depressed children that grow up to be chronically depressed adults.  The person’s own pain is the rock, and the awful parents, who’s sick deeds have not been faced, are the hard place.  The depressed person and their formidable trauma are the wall, and the sick parents, who have not been recognized as soul murderers, are the sword. 

   Once the chronically depressed person recognizes that they are victims of severe emotional and psychological abuse and deprivation and can direct this in internal mourning and grieving at the cause, the parents or care givers, the next step is to methodically and painstakingly learn how to grieve and mourn and feel these catastrophic feelings properly, which is the only method of emotional and psychological healing for any person. To do this the chronically depressed person may not follow the path of “feeling down” or “feeling hopeless” or “feeling  sad” like most deep feeling healers on their way into their pain, but instead find the entry or release in extreme emotions or breakdowns, or behaviors that counter the upside down, defensive norm.  Chronically depressed persons need very trustworthy and close support from a care giver and unconditional support to rail and rant and do “other” than what was acceptable in the very toxic parental home of the depressed person.

   Tears are medicine for the heart, and so is feeling properly felt rage and feelings of shame and guilt and hopelessness and powerlessness, and any emotions that lead to release and catharsis, and the processing of emotional and psychological pain.  With a depressed person it is time to pull the plug on the stuck Jacuzzi that won’t stop filling up with more and more empty pain, and nowhere to go with it, and get that formidable whirlpool going again.  Depressed people are normally powerful and vociferous and head strong children, very intelligent spirits that have been cut off from below and amputated from above, until they no longer can move in any way except to be visibly suffering so that the sick parent is satisfied with the spirit destruction.  When a chronically depressed person feels safe and supported enough to let go and express and interact again, the catharsis and diffusion of “stuckness” can be spectacular, or impressive to say the least, and this is a vulnerability and fear for the depressed person to be caught in such emotionality, and so requires very tender and long term support.

  For all of us survivors of womb and birth and child abuse, (and that is all of us without exception), we can now recognize that the war is over, our parents and their environments can no longer get to us, and we can now recognize that our parents have failed us and hurt us very deeply, and we can begin to feel the pain of what happened to us, in the care of a safe and trustworthy care giver.  We can now let the tears fall, and the outrage burst out, and we can heal ourselves.  We are not “sick” to need medication, and we are not “sick” to have to listen to what some other person believes about us or our lives, we simply need to learn to cry and rage and express and feel again, and we will come home to the child that we were all along, and the child we were meant to be.

   All hurt children, (and that is all of us), have a very loving and hopeful and powerful, beautiful inner child inside of us who is waiting for us to come to their rescue. For depressed persons especially, it is time to surrender to what happened, and to get that voice audible again.  “I am depressed because it is how I survived hell”.   And “I will now brave letting all hell and heaven burst forth out of me in my own strong or  loud or sweet and valuable voice, however beautiful or ugly it comes out, because I want to return to being me again”.  And then we must all, especially chronically depressed persons, get on with our true mourning and grieving, and in effect stop suffering by processing our real pain.    We need to all come home to our real inner children waiting for us, especially depressed persons, who’s inner child has served then so perfectly and faithfully.

See you tomorrow.

www.dear-roe-the-muse.com

yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com

Day 97 - Feeling Down And Unhappy - Depression Part 1

Musings From The Heart

An Essay A Day For A Year

By Roe

Day 97 April 6, 2012

Feeling Down And Unhappy

Depression Part 1

   Today I woke up feeling down and unhappy.  When I feel down I realize that previously I felt up, or higher, and now, like a depression in the ground, I feel down, or lower.  What is it exactly to feel down? Yesterday my feeling was up, and happy, while today I feel down and unhappy.  The first thing is do is examine yesterday to find the circumstances and environment of my up, happy feeling, and I find that indeed yesterday was an up and happy day, and that made me feel up and happy.  Today the circumstances of up and happy have changed, and now my environment and circumstances are down and unhappy, so I suppose I must feel down and unhappy due to the changed circumstances of my life.  It seems that the human feeling of up-ness and happiness are dependent upon environment and circumstances, and so it seems that me and my mood and happiness must be just a result of how my life goes around me.  So today I will set about to correct and amend my environment and circumstances and change it to what I want.  If I am merely a product of my life around me, and if I can change my environment and circumstances, then I can control my feelings and mood and happiness, and I can change my life.

   Unfortunately the above paragraph makes perfect sense, and it is the most normal and natural paradigm of all of our lives.  Unfortunately the above paragraph is completely false, and it is a precarious and very unhappy existence to live a life dependent on environment and circumstances.  True human feelings of up-ness and happiness are innate, interior, foundational states that precede any circumstance or environmental effects. A truly up and happy person is happy no matter the circumstance or environmental change.  A down or unhappy person is down or unhappy no matter what the circumstance or environment, and any up-ness or happiness simply becomes a temporary state which will eventually descend back into feeling down and unhappy.

   Deep in the core of our hearts and minds we are who we are, and we were meant to be gestated in the womb happily, and birthed happily, and have joyous and loving and happy childhoods.  All people who were gestated in the womb happily, and who had gentle and loving births, and who had joyous and loving and happy childhoods are up and happy people, no matter what the circumstance or environment. These people maintain their original and innate and good and happy foundational states into adulthood.  Deep in the core of our hearts and minds, all people who are down and unhappy are what they have become, and they had unhappy gestations in the womb, and horrifying and terrifying and death defying births, and they had un-joyous and un-loving and un-happy childhoods.  Down and unhappy people are not down and unhappy people at all, for feeling up and happy is our natural state.  Down and unhappy people are simply victims of down and unhappy circumstances and environments, and these people are now simply dependent on circumstances and environment for their up-ness and happiness since they have lost their normal and natural states. 

   The base line and home base and original state and common denominator and natural state of Life and humanity is Love, and Love is up and happy.  When Love is honored and valued and respected and practiced in fetuses and babies and children and, then Love remains just as it always was and always will be, up and happy and loving. When Love is dis-honored and de-valued and dis-respected and mal-practiced with fetuses and babies and children, then fetuses and babies and children get hurt and fetuses and babies and children get angry and fetuses and babies and children get disappointed, and these poor victims grow up to be adults who are down and unhappy who will always be dependent on circumstances and environment for up-ness and happiness, since they have lost their natural state.

   If up-ness and happiness are our original, natural, and innate states, that means that we can all return to this state, and what was dis-honored and de-valued and dis-respected, and mal-practiced with us as fetuses and babies and children, can be corrected, and cured, and healed, so that we can return to what we had, and what we needed, and what we expected when we were young.  The lost, natural state of inner up-ness and happiness cannot be permanently be recovered by anything we do, except for mourning for what we lost, and grieving for what happened to us, and crying and feeling the trauma and deprivation and unfulfilled needs of our inner fetuses and babies and children.   We cannot heal ourselves or be healed by anyone else unless we mourn and grieve and cry and feel our pain, it is the only way.  What happened to us to alter our natural up and happy state happened to a fetus and baby and child that was pre cortical, pre conceptual, pre verbal, pre believing, pre doing, and acting.  No idea, no thought, no concept, no words, no belief, no doing or acting can access the trauma and deprivation and unfulfilled needs of our inner fetus and inner baby, and inner child.  Only tears and feeling pain can cure or heal us, and tears are in actuality medicine for the heart, for it is the heart that is wounded in a down and unhappy person.

  We will never be happy by believing in God, and God cannot help us to find inner happiness, we cannot become rich or famous to be happy, we cannot go to college or buy that coveted anything to be happy, and we cannot fall in Love or Love or find anyone who will ever make us happy, if we are down and unhappy by inner nature as a result of what happened to us.  God and religion are circumstantial and environmental crutches, money and education and status are circumstantial and environmental crutches, material possessions and Love and people in our lives are circumstantial and environmental crutches, and the proof is obvious in how we feel and act when we stop our belief and devotion to outside sources and help (religion and God), stop working and studying and buying and proving and producing and stop chasing that up and happy rainbow in any way. Everyone of course that is down or unhappy, by their lost nature after a sad and disappointing and traumatic childhood and life, simply falls apart and returns back to being down and unhappy when they get off the treadmill of up-ness and happiness maintenance and searching.  We lost our selves and our up-ness and happiness long before any of the above, and so any attempts for happiness other than facing our own pain and problems from our birth and childhoods are ineffectual. 

   When we were conceived we were perfect and exquisite creatures, no less than a V12 Formula 1 factory racing Ferrari on the starting line on race day.  After a life of getting abused and beat up, when our engines are down 3 cylinders, when we have bad shocks, when our tires are flat and worn out, the only way we can return to an exquisite and happy, winning race day, is to return to the original race drivers (us as fetuses and babies and children) and shop (our childhood home), and mechanics (our parents), where everything got ruined, and effect the repairs (grieve and cry), so that we can be restored.  Believing in and worshipping the Grand Ferrari God in the sky is not going to help us, studying and excelling in automotive design isn’t going to help us, becoming a rich collector or sponsor isn’t going to help us, learning to drive better or mechanic better isn’t going to help us, and buying everything in sight to impress everyone and be famous isn’t going to help us.  We must face our beginnings and heal and cure and restore the root origin of us, and we will return to our beautiful and up and happy, high performance, racing, Ferrari selves.

   I am still feeling down and unhappy today.  This means that I need a good, deep cry, and I need to follow my down-ness and unhappiness to the root cause of why, after a lifetime, I am still feeling the ups and downs of a life of ups and downs, that has been going up and down since I was even in the womb of my mother.  I’ve got 11 cylinders firing now, and my shocks are perfect.  My left front tire is still a bit unpredictable, and now my paint back there near the exhaust is flaking off.  One day I’ll be up and happy no matter what my circumstances or environment are, and my fellow readers, that will be race day.  I hope I see you there.

www.dear-roe-the-muse.com

yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com

Day 96 - The Home Schooling Disaster Part 2

Musings From The Heart

An Essay A Day For A Year

By Roe

Day 96 April 5, 2012

The Home Schooling Disaster

Part 2

It is already difficult enough as traditional parents to honor the enormous benchmarks of ideal parenting outlined in part 1. To be on the side of the child we must be lateral to the child in personhood, and equal to the child in value, but be a gentle fascist dictator simply at times of nutrition and safety, and nothing more. We must never invest in the outcome of our children in any way, except that they simply be alive, well nourished, and happy. As the “teacher” of our children, we break every rule of potentially beautiful parenting, and we degrade ourselves to simple “little Hitlers”, that not only arrogantly believe that we know better than our child, (an enormous moral and ethical transgression to our child), we also believe that we have the right and power to wield our mistaken arrogance, (an even bigger moral and ethical transgression to our child).

Children learn by comparison and contrast vis a vis the community around them. If children must be victims of arrogant and mistrusting fascistic schooling, they absolutely must not see the parent as an authority figure, and absolutely must never see the parent as a disciplinarian, and absolutely must never feel as though they are expected or coerced into any outcome at all by the parent. This is a direct violation of everything that every child hopes for and holds dear for their own parents. Children must be used and abused and mistreated and expected and coerced and pushed and disciplined and forced and inspired and championed and admired and rewarded and a 100 other life lessons by OTHER adults and children, and as many as possible in as many ways as possible, and always return home to their parents as mutual soul-spirit guides as heroes, and see their parents as heroes.

Children absolutely must have the freedom to be uncivilized as long as they desire, to fight and break and yell and cuss and mistreat and rebel and do stupid and ridiculous things, and basically be selfish and self centered and anti anything and everything authority questioners and authority rebellers and authority haters, and eventually they will become honest and fearless, loving citizens of the world. You can never suppress a human spirit or you will create the opposite of what is feared. A good childhood education is about the child having the freedom to test the waters and buck the system, and fit in to our world around us or not, by their own choice, which is always valued, and this is impossible around the oppression of a combined parent-teacher.

Learning information and data and memorizing and regurgitation and testing is for parrots and circus dogs, and obedient citizens that work for other people and pay their taxes and obediently go off to wars to die without a clue why, except obedience to false patriotism at the hands of other half dead people like us all that were “taught” and “educated” and “schooled”. We must provide the freedom and choice for our modern children to save and correct this world that we have ruined, and we cannot teach them how to do that, or we would have done it ourselves. A child that is schooled at home has an enormous conflict of interest, and the championing, spirit-guide parent now becomes the representative of our greedy, faulty, nuclear, warring status quo. The parent becomes the judge, jury, executioner, God, friend, parent, and teacher, and it is too much and too daunting for parent and child to combine these roles.

The conflict of interest of parent-teacher kills freedom, the highest ideal of all living things, and it kills childhood, where every aspect of the child is now controlled and orchestrated by parents with questionable motives, questionable skills, questionable emotional and psychological health, and questionable knowledge. Good parents trying to produce “good” children misunderstand the need for the freedom to not be good, and to face the natural lack of good out there in community. Teachers are professional teachers, while parents are professional parents, and the roles are incompatible. Every person has a memory of that person or teacher that changed our lives, and it is a tragedy to mother hen and father hen our children at home, and deny them the chance for great disappointment and great inspiration from others far more qualified than the parent. I lobby for wonderful parents in a wonderful house full of deep trust and respect of their children, where the children happen to go to crappy schools with crappy teachers and crappy kids, and who get an amazing education of life itself in the trenches, but who may not have learned much data or information, rather than some “ideal” education in a mediocre home with mediocre parents and a mediocre education, all designed “for the better” of the child. Home schooling is oppression for parents and children alike, and a life stunter for all.

The option for home schoolers is to trust our children to determine their own lives since birth, and these children will astonish their parents in 20 years with their compassion and individuality, and their stunning education. This freedom for children and trust of children is called self regulation, and “auto-didaction”. Self regulation means that the parent trusts that the child will eventually become who they are meant to be, and fulfill their own lives and dreams their own way, with no help from the parents unless the child expressly requests and welcomes it. In self regulation the parent allows the child to regulate themselves, and that means do anything they want to do anytime they want to do it, unless it directly affects health and nutrition, or safety, or the freedoms of other people. That means since birth the child is free and never molded or coerced or forced to do anything they don’t want to do.

Auto didaction means “self education”, and that means that the child teaches themself. An auto didactic child can learn anything that they want to learn with total parental support, but the child does not have to learn anything that they do not want to learn ever. In true self education the parent may never intervene or expect any outcome, and the parent only strives to be on the side of the child, and insure that the child is happy. In auto didaction the parent does nothing but follow the interests and passions of the child, and the parent is thereby always in the side of the child.

In freedom for children and self regulation and auto didaction, there are no “what ifs”, no “what if they don’t learn”, “what if they don’t read”, “what if they don’t get a high school diploma or go to college”. No “what if they don’t become successes or prosperous”. In freedom for children the parents drop the reins of the children and stop driving them like horses in any given direction, trusting that the child already has their own direction and outcome of their lives. What the child does in freedom is none of the parents’ business, except to have an interest in and support the children in their own personal passions. The results are spectacular and surpass anything any fascistic home or school or society could ever hope for.

Self regulation and auto didaction are the only possible compromise for home schooling parents that do not want to send their children to school, or for children who do not want to go to school. Parents of free children simply get off of the backs of their children, stop the childhood killing homework and chores and expectations and discipline and sermonizing and leading and hoping and blah blah blah. Parents of free children have happy and vibrant, passionate children who respect and admire their parents as people-parent-spirit-guides, and life at home becomes lateral and loving, and fun. For parents it is also a lot more difficult, since a free child will be the first to tell their parent what they feel fearlessly, for free, self regulated and auto didactic children are fearless of authority, and ready, willing, and able to push for the edges of boundaries and enjoy a happy childhood of bucking the “system”, and finding their own true selves.

Parents of free children find out quickly the quality of their own lives and person and education and values when their free, self evolved and self effaced children who use their prodigious voices. Freedom for parents and children is the opposite of fascism. “You can lead a child anywhere, but you can’t really get them to believe anything you say or to do shit” (my not so eloquent expression) But parents can stop pretending to know what is better for their children and then stop forcing them to do it, and they and their children will be a lot happier and a lot healthier.

Here is to “home freedom”, and “freedom for parents and children”. Here is to the adventure of Love and of Life that we determine ourselves in freedom.

www.dear-roe-the-muse.com

yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com

Day 95 - The Home Schooling Disaster Part 1

Musings From The Heart

An Essay A Day For A Year

By Roe

Day 95 April 4, 2012

The Home Schooling Disaster

Part 1

Home schooling is a a disaster for children everywhere. My heart goes out to any child that is ever schooled, for no one should ever be “schooled”, but “home” schooling degrades and and misuses the beauty of parenting, and further degrades “schooling” beyond its already negative effects upon children. There, I wanted to make sure that the reader could glean that I am against the schooling of children, and even more so, the home schooling of children. How did I do? Now I suppose I should get on with “why” I feel this way.

The first “idea” to wrap our minds around, is the mistaken idea that any child or person for that matter should be “schooled”, or “taught”, or “educated” at all. All three of these ideas are fascistic ideas of hierarchical arrogance, and it all boils down to trust in oneself and then trust in others, or the lack thereof. If we were not trusted to know what we wanted and how we would reach or accomplish what we wanted ourselves, and we were “schooled” and “taught” and “educated”, then clearly we will not remember or know that you cannot ever “school” or “teach” or “educate” anyone, especially a child, unless they themselves welcome it and want it. And no child or person ever wants to be “schooled” or “taught” or “educated”. All we ever want to do is learn when we are ready, and how we are ready, and why we are ready, and where we are ready, and you cannot ever force anyone to learn, much less a child, unless you want to destroy their natural indivduality. We have all been bashed in the heart and mind and teeth so many times by so much misused authority that we can no longer remember the obvious and inherent need in all children for freedom, and someone who will trust us that we already know what to do, and what and when we want to learn.

I have written several essays about children and schooling already that would be helpful to read as background support to the above passion of mine against fascism against anyone, especially against children. I have listed the essay numbers at the end of this essay. But this essay is against “home schooling”, which means against parents that are in effect home “fascists” (perhaps without even thinking about it), who believe that “a child must be schooled”, and “my child must have a good education”, and “children must be taught”, all brainwashings that came from their own lives as victims of parental and societal fascism and compulsory schooling. Why is “home fascism” more damaging than even lousy schools? As a matter of fact lousy schools provide for an amazing “education”, if education is more than just parroting information, while home schooling cages children in massive conflicts and oppression from every direction, with no escape.

A parent is meant to be a spirit guide for the lucid and omniscient babies that come into our lives as Love children. Parents are meant to Love their children exactly as they are, and never try and mold them or influence them beyond their innate selves and personalities. Parents are meant to trust their children that they know what they want, and what they want to do, from even when they are in the womb, right up to adulthood. Parents are meant to be on the side of their children, and not above them as persons. Parents are meant to treat their children like welcome and honored guests in their households. Parents are meant to recognize that the next generation is always more adept and more savvy and more capable than their own, and always seek to provide for the environment of happiness, and support, and a hopeful future, so that destiny can manifest itself naturally. Parents are meant to recognize that their own children have a better start, a better chance, and a better life than they themselves had, and to get out of the way of these bright spirits that still possess everything that they themselves as parents have lost.

Parents are meant to be the champions of their children to be just as they are, and to become who they are meant to be. Parents should be the first to welcome and trust true childhood, which is 20 years of imagination and boredom and fantasy and play and idleness and laziness and unruliness and obstinance and selfishness and self centeredness and rebellion and arrogance and on and on and on, all crucial and healthy stages of childhood that lead to healthy personhood. Parents should be the first to recognize true selfhood and true individuality, and true personhood, however the unique, young, passionate, genius child manifests it, and hopefully completely differently than any other child or spirit has ever done it before. A parent is a unique spirit-mentor-guide for their own children. Parents are not meant to be teachers, for you cannot teach, you can only learn, they are not meant to be sermonizers, for you cannot be made to believe, you can only believe, and parents are not meant to be disciplinarians, for you cannot discipline, you can only choose to obey.

Parents are already fascist dictators by design, having total power and control over young and powerless spirits. And parents always make the enormous error in imagining that just because children are small and needy, that they are also limited in their emotional and mental and psychological capacities. Our children are always more than we are or ever hoped to be. In truth all children are always watching their parents, just like we did our own parents, and we children are always noting when and where and how often our parents fall short in valuing and respecting and honoring us as unique and intelligent and very powerful spirits. We always note when our parents abuse and misuse their capacity as fascist dictators, and we are always so disappointed in them trying to guide us to be like them and their society. We normally have little value and respect for the lives of our parents and the society that they live in, since the lives of our parents are largely unfulfilled, if not a disaster, and the world they command is in shambles. As children we long for and dream of the day when our parents will notice us and value us and respect us and honor us and trust us to show them what we know and can do.

To be continued tomorrow. See you tomorrow.

www.dear-roe-the-muse.com

yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com

Related essays about children: Essays 3, 15, 27, 28, 36, 43, 55, 56, 58, 68, 75, 77, and more to come.

Day 94 - Ecstatic Birth Part 7 - Pregnancy Sex

Musings From The Heart

An Essay A Day For A Year

By Roe

Day 94 April 3, 2012

Ecstatic Birth Part 7

Pregnancy Sex!

The most wonderful way that ecstatic Mommy to be and ecstatic Daddy to be can prepare for their ecstatic birth and ecstatic Baby, is to make lots and lots of ecstatic Love for the nine months while baby is growing. Sex is fun and feels good right? So let’s plan on having a lot of sex and very often, and feeling lots and lots of ecstasy! The truth is that Mommy to be is an emotional and hormonal roller coaster, and often even a bona fide nut case, and great sex enjoyed often does not usually fit in with the stresses of pregnancy. Mommy’s hormonal surges tell her body and brain that “you’re pregnant”, and why in the world would she go on mating and mating and mating? She would have to be the most promiscuous kitty in the alley to keep breeding and breeding after she has already been bred. Mommy of course carries in her psyche the historical breeding pattern and legacy of every mammal and living creature that came before her. But Mommy is also a human sex Goddess in the modern world, and a horny little preggie lover too.

That is why pregnancy is such a wonderful time for couples regarding sexuality, since “getting creative” is the name of the game. Mommy to be must always remember that this pregnancy and baby are not just about her, and Daddy to be deserves as much devotion and attention as she does, and attention and devotion for Daddy equals regular great sex, and especially regular sexual release for him. A Daddy to be with an excess of anxiety and sperm count is a tense and uneasy Daddy, and so if Mommy wants peace and support, it is crucial to keep Daddy well drained. Some preggie Mommies are hella sexy and sexual during pregnancy, and those Daddies don’t need to work so hard to be creative, as a matter of fact, keeping her pregnant is all he has to do!. For the Mommies that just don’t feel sexy or sexual often, it is crucial that both Mommy and Daddy work very hard to expand and evolve their sex life, and to both focus on each other and their sexual needs. It is also crucial to focus on the ecstatic needs of Baby.

Orgasm, climax, or sexual release is a bodily function designed to enhance the pleasure response, which enhances the pregnancy rate. It is Nature’s design to conceive. But human sexual climax for men and women is far more than that. For a species that can mate at any time of day all year long, and as many times as they want, for humans sexual climax goes far beyond mere procreation. Orgasm for men and women is a bodily response to discharge tension and pain, and to soothe the entire psycho-emotional-physical system. Men who orgasm turn from angry bears to baby cubs in mere moments after orgasm, and a peaceful sleep for a man is immediately followed by a great sperm discharge. To all women everywhere: keep your man sexually happy and sexually relieved and you will keep your man enamored and at ease, and your life will thereby be enamored and at ease. Withholding sex from a married man is a form of misandry (man hating), and a way that a woman expresses anger and rage and subjugation and control of her man, and it is cruel. One to two times a week is a healthy interval for any healthy man. A woman does not have to engage in sexual intercourse to help her man with natural sexual release, but she does have to care about his needs as much as or more than her own. This is part of loving a man.

For a woman intending an ecstatic birth, the more ecstasy that she can feel sexually, and the more ecstasy that her man can feel sexually, and the more ecstasy that the baby can feel, the more ecstatic the birth will be. The more tension and stress and pain that a woman and man can release through orgasm, the more relaxed and at ease parents will be, and the more relaxed and at ease the baby will be, and the more relaxed and at ease the birth will be. Baby feels everything that Mommy feels and there is no joy greater in the world for a fetus than to be in utero when Mommy feels regular orgasms. Wow! Feel the Love and share the Love with Baby!

Mommy too is a cat with sharp claws until she screams out her climax, and then she purrs and everything falls into place. While lover boy immediately drifts off to sleep after orgasm, Mommy to be can now be clear and focused and feel at peace with her myriad responsibilities of being a Goddess. To all men: It is crucial to the self esteem and feeling of being Loved for a woman to feel regular sexual orgasms. When a woman comes she feels beautiful and important, and wanted by her man, and her world balances. Depriving any woman of her own crucial sexual orgasm whenever she desires is no less a misogyny towards a married woman than the abuse of women outside the marriage for a man who is unsatisfied. A man who loves his woman gets her off sexually and often like no other, it is his demonstration of his caring and fathering ability to her, and pregnancy is no less of a time to be King Mufasa with the happiest lioness in the kingdom than any other. This is part of loving a woman.

Daddy to be must realize that he must woo and court and enamor Mommy like never before to entice her into sexy, groovy, sweaty love making. Now is the time for romance , for laughing and partying and screwing around like teenagers. Now is the time for music and dancing and candles and dressing up, and being in Love. There is nothing sexier on the planet than the sight and sound and feel of loving a pregnant woman, and there is no sex better than making sensuous Love pregnant, and with a gorgeous pregnant woman. Now is the time for Daddy to realize that there is much more to sex for Mommy than just fucking, or just penetration, or merely his discharge. Every decent male lover knows that he never comes before his queen, and he never comes if his queen doesn’t come. He may come without her only if his beauty begs to be left without climax, or as her chosen gift to him. For pregnant Mommy, just cuddling and petting and kissing her back and neck until she sleeps is making Love. Long foreplay and amazing deep kissing and nothing more is making Love, and full body massages and sex play with oils and toys for her pleasure is making Love. For preggie Mommy feeling loved and in Love and being made to feel beautiful and important and special is making Love, and her man must realize that there is more to sex than just Dick and Pussy.

Pregnancy is the greatest time to play around and try on new routines for sex, new places for sex, new times for sex, and new ideas for sex. Pregnancy is the most wonderful time to throw away self loathing, pre conceived ideas of morality that come from archaic culture or religion or antiquated parents, of good and bad, and of clean and dirty, and of should and should nots. In wonderful and beautiful pregnancy anything goes that is consensual and pleasurable for both partners. Now the couple in ecstatic Love has nine months to go through the wonderful books in the bookstore of romantic nights, of tantric sex, of 1001 positions, and myriads of ideas that are just plain affectionate fun, right through to ecstatic kinky shit. It is time to practice and become experts at the art of Daddy fingering and groping Mommy, gradual one-two-three-four-five fingering, right through to fisting Mommy, the best pre pregnancy exercise on the planet. This is called a vaginal “massage” and wonderful preparation for birth. And Mommy, you have never felt an orgasm like the one that your lover boy gives you with his gentle fist, together with a delicate tongue on the clitty. Now is the time for Mommy to turn her vaginal muscles into the most ecstatic elevator to milk a man that the world has ever seen while she sits on top of him, without him even moving or thrusting, and massages his penis with her internal muscles. In this way she can learn expert control over her vaginal tense and release muscles that Baby will call upon during labor and birth. All women can learn to tighten the vaginal muscles to impede the entry of a small finger, and then release all muscles to allow the entry of a full fist, and this is expert birthing preparation, and great sexy fun.

When Mommy is tired in late pregnancy, hot sex is the best cardio on the planet, and you will need an athlete’s heart and lungs during labor Mommy, so keep on loving and fucking and do it often, instead of those walks or that useless Stairmaster or treadmill at the gym. Time to work up to a full hour of frenetic fuck and roll each day without breaking a sweat! When Mommy becomes sore from penetration, simply find a position that feels nice, or don’t penetrate. Use your tongue Daddy and perfect your pussy kissing ability often until the neighbors become alarmed at the cat screeching in your bed at night, and then let her be happy with her pleasure without needing yours. Mommy you should receive your pleasure your way, and be honest and courageous in telling and training your lover boy. But don’t forget is needs. Remember that you have adept hands for that boy-style had job, and remember to take his seed into your mouth as proof of your love to him when you satisfy him with those lips that he is so in love with. Any woman that does not adore her man’s seed must question whether she adores her man, since his seed is a billion or more of her man, and her man prizes his seed as highly as himself. If a man also as issues with his own seed, then he must face his own issues of not truly prizing his own self. The ecstatic Love baby is conceived of wonderful man seed, and peace and Love must be made between the couple with wonderful man sperm.

During pregnancy is the greatest time to learn to play fantasy games and role plays, and power games of the events of your childhoods and lives. “I am the princess and you are the bad boy climbing the tower, and instead of saving me you are going to ravage me!” “Now I am the prince and you won’t have it that you ride on the back of the horse, so you spin me around and take me like the little pregnant witchy that you are!” Pregnancy is a great time to celebrate being in Love, and get creative in surrendering to each other and your inner sexual selves and needs and fantasies, and make sex fun and often!

The greatest joy of all during pregnancy is anal sex, and any couple that hasn’t perfected gentle and loving and passionate anal sex doesn’t know what they are missing. Throw your sexual shame and self denigrating and woman denigrating Bible in the garbage where it belongs, and be proud of all pleasure from and with your two beautiful and perfect bodies. Women that have evolved and cultivated anal orgasms report that they are 2 to 4 times more powerful and pleasurable than vaginal orgasms, and with anal sex baby doesn’t get in the way so easily. Remember that anal sex never, never hurts, unless both partners desire it so. The anus is the most erogenous part of the body after the finger tips and clitoris and penis head, and Daddy too can really enjoy receiving his finger job or rim job or strap-on sex from Mommy. This is a favorite from virtually all men, so turn the tables Mommy and enjoy!

If couples are struggling with their own carnal and libidinous desires vis a vis shame and doubt and guilt and morality, and especially the oppression of pleasure hating religion, it is time to graduate out of the ridiculous and archaic middle ages and accept that in Love and consent all sexual activity is beautiful and acceptable. It is time to throw those manipulating, disgusting old religious texts away and embrace beautiful humanity and the Love of pleasure that is shared and given joyously and ecstatically. If Mommy and Daddy are sexually repressed and hung up after a life of terrible parenting and our Puritan repressive sexual culture, now is the time for lots and lots of beautiful, messy, noisy fucking in every possible way. If there is a God, he or she Loves us to Love, and express Love, and pleasure is Love, and sex is Love, and there is no restraint on mutual and consensual Love of any kind. Anyone in history who wrote otherwise was a man hater and a woman hater and a life hater and a lover hater and a God hater, and should not be trusted. We are all beautiful and all sex is beautiful when shared in mutual joy.

The worst we could ever do is pass on our own sexual problems and hang ups and traumas that our fearful and repressed parents and culture dumped on us onto our beautiful baby that is coming to us. Let us enjoy ourselves and each other in any way that feels good, and if Mommy doesn’t feel like she is in the mood, then Daddy better turn on that charm and humor and romance. Or turn up the speed on that dildo. And don’t forget Daddy lots and lots of hugs and kisses that Mommy requires to know that she is beautiful and wanted even without penetration. All you have to do Mommy is keep lover boy cranking out that sperm and getting it out for him, and then you will both live happily ever after. And when you live happily ever after, Baby will be ecstatic and you will have an ecstatic birth, and all will live happily ecstatically, sexually ever after.

See you tomorrow.

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