Sunday, July 15, 2012

Day 149 - The Only Way To Find Happiness - Part 2


Musings From The Heart
An Essay A Day For A Year
By Roe
Day 149 May 28, 2012



The Only Way To Find Happiness
Part 2



It is impossible for us to be unhappy and still believe that we have had good and decent parents, for in order for us to be deeply unhappy we most certainly had bad and indecent parents. The worst thing that any unhappy person can do is to idealize their own parents, the worst thing any unhappy person can do is to shelter their own parents from blame and their own awareness that they are victims of child trauma and deprivation from bad and indecent parents.  Any parent that allows a fetus and newborn to be traumatized in a sadistic, intervention “managed” birth in a hospital is a bad and indecent parent.  Any parent that allows a newborn to be manhandled at birth and separated from its mother at birth is a bad and indecent parent, and any parent that does not allow a newborn to sleep in the arms of its mother and father in their own bed, is a bad and indecent parent.  Any parent that allows the sadistic genital mutilation of circumcision in their son is a bad and indecent parent, and any parent that does not allow their child to freely cry at any time and receive patient and loving support at all times is a bad and indecent parent.  The list of ignorant and inept and bad and indecent parenting is hundreds of pages long, while the list of loving parenting is very short, it is simply putting the primal needs of happiness of their child first and foremost, beyond any ignorance or ineptitude or needs of the parent, and this means that part of loving parenting is educating oneself and healing oneself so that our own pains are not passed onto our children. 
“My parents did their best” is a defense and a copout from unhappy people that themselves birth and fail their own unhappy children.  There is no excuse for the ignorant and inept parenting that we all received, and for the sadistic hell that is perpetrated upon newborns in hospitals daily.  In order for us all to reach towards our own happiness we must face the fact that our parents were unhappy people who have sadly let us down. In order for us to be happy we all need long term, deep feeling therapy, where we mourn and grieve what happened to us at the hands of our parents, and only then can we clear our unconscious psyches of the trauma and deprivation and unfulfilled needs of our early lives. In order to become loving and caring parents ourselves, we must not repeat the ineptness and ignorance of our parents, and we must first heal ourselves and our own deep primal pain before we pass it onto our children.  We must never birth in fear and trauma in hospitals, we must never allow our infants to be separated from us, we must always allow our babies to sleep with us in our beds.  We must never, never genitally mutilate our sons with circumcision, and we must always lovingly allow our children to cry, and cry as long as they need to. We must always be willing to meet the emotional and psychological needs of our children, and we must put the needs of our own children’s happiness in first position, and that means putting our own emotional and psychological healing in first position. In order to put the needs of our children before our own, we absolutely must turn inwards and face and heal all of our own monsters and demons that our parents put there, for if we don’t, we clearly are victimized monsters and demons ourselves, and clearly monsters and demons to our own innocent children.
We are all conceived to be clear, loving, blue-sky souls, full of joy and Love, and the faulty nurture that we received at the hands of our parents and caregivers and world created terrible black storm clouds that simply hide our ability to feel happy, and deny us clear sight of our beautiful selves.  To be truly happy we must return deeply into our own heart-psyche selves to stand face to face with our own faulty parents and with eyes and hearts full of tears, ask: “What did you do to me Mommy and Daddy that I am so unhappy, and what did I need that you did not fulfill Mommy and Daddy that I am still so unhappy?”  We must be able to say: “You failed me Mommy and Daddy and I am hurt, and I am unhappy”.  We will find our happiness by facing our unhappiness, and this entire process is an internal mourning and grieving loop that we perfect in the present, but about our long lost and long repressed past. There is no need to face our real parents eye to eye in the present.
We are perfectly designed to heal ourselves, and nothing that ever wounded us in the past can ever harm us now in the present.  We are only in fear of the pain that robbed us of our beautiful births and babyhoods and childhoods, and we will remain unhappy until we reclaim back what is ours.  What is ours is ALL of ourselves, and when we have all of ourselves we have our happiness.  I long for true happiness, and I long to heal my inner child that is so unhappy.  I know you long for true happiness too, and I know that you too can heal the child within you that is so unhappy.  I wish you all the Love that you always dreamed of, for if you can brave to heal yourself, it will all be yours.  Your own children are right there waiting for the happiness they deserve, as are mine.  To change the world we must heal ourselves to become happy, and then our happy children will change the world.

See you tomorrow.


yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com






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