Musings
From The Heart
An
Essay A Day For A Year
By
Roe
Day
155 June 3, 2012
“Why
do I Always Fall In Love With The Wrong Man?”
Part
1
Women across the world cry: “Why
do I always fall in Love with the wrong man?” I say:
Well honey, it’s because you are the wrong woman. The notion that women, like sweet little
lotus flowers, are good and right, nice and sweet, while the Mr.’s that she
repeatedly falls in Love with always turn out to be bad and wrong and mean and
sour, is ridiculous. The aliens that
cultivate us for food say that after you separate the skin and genitals from
our bodies, all human’s look and taste the same. All women and all men have
aspects that are good and bad, right and wrong, nice and mean, and sweet and sour,
and each aspect attracts itself. Love is the pod and males and females are the
two peas. If the male pea is a prince, his counterpart is a princess, and if
the male counterpart is an asshole, you will always find his bitch at his side,
though you may not see her on the surface. If a woman falls in Love with any man that
turns out to be a lemon, especially if this experience is a repeat, she is most
certainly his complement of lemon-ness.
Just because women “appear” benign, or as victims, does not mean that
they are less “wrong” than any man. As a matter of fact, the list of vile and
wicked and unsavory in females can far outstretch a man’s, and the fact that it
is hard to detect is the formidable power that females possess with their nice,
flower-like disguises.
Anyone who repeatedly falls
in Love is not actually in Love, and perhaps has never been in Love, or maybe
doesn’t even know what Love is. True soul-mate, conjugal Love comes around
maybe once in a lifetime, two if you are ever so lucky. Once you are truly in
Love with another soul, you are never out of Love with that soul. To go from one Love to another is to go from
one fetish and infatuation and dependency and indulgence to another, and loving
the next person after the last string of persons is simply a personal neurosis
that happens to align with theother lover’s own neurosis at the right or wrong
place and time. What happened to the last love and person that were loved? Love
is not forgotten and superseded so easily. Love is not like changing your shoes
when they get worn, and most definitely not in judgment of the last pair as if
you have perfect feet, and as you move on to the next pair of lovers or
partners or shoes.
We all fall in “attention” with and fall in
“affection” with and fall in “sex” with and fall in “dependence” with and fall
in “convenience” with our lovers and mates. We all fall in irritation and
annoyance and disgust and dislike with our lovers, as most Love is defensive
and driven out of our unconscious alter egos that cause us to buzz libidinously
in defense from our lovers and mates.
Most Love is not Love at all, but a rivalrous and rebellious and
libidinous psycho-sexual, social dance with our mates that tickles our fancies,
and that tickles our hearts, and that tickles our genitals. When we fall in
Love, we fall in primal infant imprint repeat with the Love situation of Mommy
and Daddy, and we fall in childhood nostalgia with all that is beautiful about
the Love that Daddy had for us if we are females, and the Love that Mommy had
for us if we are males. We also fall in
defensive anger and hate with our lovers and mates as the pain of how our Mommy
failed us begins to come conscious for us males, and as the pain of how our
Daddy failed us begins to come conscious for us females. We fall in Love with the exquisite dream that
we can convert and redeem and change our childhood heartbreaks and traumas and
deprivations into happiness and goodness. Love for all people is a chance to
repeat the joy of our childhood joy, and to the chance to fix the pain of our
childhood sadness in our new Mommy for males, and our new Daddy for females.
Women that are drawn to men
with “issues” like a moth to a flame most certainly had Daddies with issues,
and how sweet it is to be in close proximity again with sweet Daddy that loves
us and wants us and needs us and cares for us so much. That is until new Daddy goes off his rocker
just like real Daddy did, that is until new Papa rears his ugly, disrespecting
and abusing and mongering and violent and irresponsible and harmful head, and
that is when females are smack dab in the middle of their sick nest of
childhood fear and harm and sadness and pain, and smack dab in the middle of
their co-dependency nightmare of a bad man with themselves as an injured
victim. “If I could only redeem and
amend and repair him and then be happy and live happily ever after” she feels
in her heart. This is the actual
definition of neurosis, and the heart of disrespecting and abusing and violent
and irresponsible and harmful females in co-neurosis and co-dependency with
their males.
There is no such thing as a
victim, there never has been and there never will be, all pain contains it’s
counter pain, and all situations contain their complement and opposite. Every aggressor has his or her provocateur. Every
boy attracts his girl, every whore attracts her whoremonger, every loser
attracts his loser-ette. Daddy made Love
to or fucked Mommy, that is how we got here, and each of our neurotic parents
had their own even more neurotic mothers and fathers. It is a miracle that we survive to Love at all
as children with the horrific abuses perpetrated consciously and unconsciously
upon all children each and every day.
To be fair, let’s repeat
this paragraph for the world full of males that struggle with high maintenance,
caustic, and harmful females. Men that
are drawn to women with “issues” like a moth to a flame most certainly had
Mommies with issues, and how sweet it is to be in close proximity again with
sweet Mommy that loves us and wants us and needs us and cares for us so
much. That is until new Mommy goes off
her rocker just like real Mommy did, that is until Mama rears her ugly, disrespecting
and abusing and slutty and bitchy and irresponsible and harmful head, and that
is when males are smack dab in the middle of their sick nest of childhood fear
and harm and sadness and pain, and smack dab in the middle of their
co-dependency nightmare of a bad woman with themselves as an injured victim.
“If I could only redeem and amend and repair her and then be happy and live
happily ever after”, he feels in his
heart. This is the actual definition of
neurosis, and the heart of disrespecting and abusing and violent and
irresponsible and harmful males in co-neurosis and co-dependency with their
females.
To be continued tomorrow in
part 2
See you tomorrow
yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com
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