Musings
From The Heart
An
Essay A Day For A Year
By
Roe
Day
115 April 24, 2012
Patience
And Love Please Mommy And Daddy
This morning I was really
trying to enjoy my favorite weak coffee and my delicious vegetarian eggs
benedict at a roadside café, when I was interrupted by a young couple who were
taking turns abusing their little 4 year old son “Brandon”. I really felt sorry for adorable Brandon at
the hand of these two ogre parents. The
scene immediately caused me to remember how many times you and I have been victims
of our own ogre parents, and how many times we have been ogres with our own innocent
little children. Yes, I know you saw me those times that I acted like a damn
fool with my kids, and yes, I was there too when you did those things you regret
with your children. The truth is that we
are all in a lot of pain from what happened to us as children at the hands of
our parents and caregivers, and it is true that we end up letting our pain out
on our own powerless and helpless children, exactly like everything was let out
on us. The truth is there is no excuse
for how we were treated as children, and no excuse for how we treat our own
children. The truth is that we all should be ashamed of ourselves, and we must
stop immediately our abusive treatment, both overt and silent, and both
subversive and degrading, of our beautiful little innocent children that love
us so much.
“Brandon, what is wrong with
you? Why can’t you sit still”? And then the Dad glared at him in the eyes
like a laser beam glares at the steel which it is melting.
Never, never glare at your
children in the eyes with anger, or rage, or hatred, or any other strong,
negative emotion, for any reason. The eyes are the window into the soul, and
meanness driven into the soul of your child through the eyes deeply wounds your
children and breaks their hearts. This
Dad was obviously deeply abused when he was a little boy in the same way, and
this Dad passes his own pain onto his own sweet little boy, like it was passed
on to him when he was a sweet little boy, and this is devastating. This Dad is effectively a coward, for he
would not look at a full grown unlimited cage fighter in the eyes the same way
unless he wants one of his arms broken. He only does it to a helpless,
defenseless 4 year old boy because he can get away with it, and sadly he does it to his own little child
that deeply loves him unconditionally.
Never, never glare at your children in the eyes!
Of course children can’t sit
still, this is an inherent beauty of childhood, and it is wonderful and it
never needs to be addressed. When energetic and passionate young children are
left to be children for 20 years with total love and support, they will eventually
become calm and graceful adults, with lots of patience to respect and admire
the spirit of their own future children.
Mom and Dad should have taken little Brandon outside to run and play and
laugh while the meal was on its way, and Mom and Dad should have made Brandon
and his immaturities and needs paramount over their own, with gentility and
love, or they should have never had a child.
Have patience with your children for 20 years or so, and let them be
children for 20 years or so, for they and childhood are beautiful and
wonderful.
Never, never say “what is
wrong with you” to any person, let alone a child, and especially your own
child. The only person that has
something wrong with them is the person that says “what is wrong with you” to
another person. The statement is arrogant, and demeaning, and suggests that
there is something “wrong” with your child.
There is nothing wrong with your child, for your child is an angel of
Love doing his or her best simply to grow up with a real messed up parent, yes
you and me, and they need all the respect and kindness we can muster. Everyone
makes mistakes, and childhood is in fact a 20 year adventure of making
mistakes, and all mistakes are welcome all the time for children, for it is
part of simply living and learning and growing up for a child. Any person that tries to make another person feel bad or less or at fault, let alone a
child, with a statement like “what is
wrong with you” is a coward and an ogre.
This kind of parenting injures, and creates anger and shame and
rebellion in children, just like it caused in us when our own idiot parents
acted so poorly I dare Dad to say that
same phrase to the cage fighter again, and now he will have two broken arms instead
of just one. Never, never make
statements like this to any person, especially your own child.
“Brandon, how many times
have I told you not to crumble up your crackers and throw them! Now you aren’t going to get your
hotdog!” And them Mom looked at her
little 4 year old boy, and she shook her head from side to side, and rolled her
eyes.
Never, never insult or mock
or patronize another person with head shaking and eye rolling, or any other
negative body language, especially your own child. This behavior is immature
and cruel, and when a woman does this to any child she injures them. This Moms was obviously deeply abused when she
was a little girl in the same way, and this Mom passes her own pain onto her
own sweet little boy, like it was passed on to her when she was a sweet little
girl, and this is devastating.for her child and she breaks his heart. When a mother does this to her own son she
teaches him anger and rage at the female, and she is the creator of a future
misogynist. This Mom is a coward, for she would have never treated her husband
like this on their first date, or any man ever, if she didn’t want a black and
blue eye, or worse. Never, never insult and degrade a person with arrogant and
demeaning statements like “how many times have I told you” to any adult unless
you want another black and blue eye or worse, and never, never to a child or to
your own innocent angels that are in truth trying so hard, just like you were when
you were abused by your parents.
Of course Brandon plays with
his food and makes messes, that is what childhood is all about, and it is
priceless and beautiful. Brandon is only
4 years old! This issue does not need to
be addressed, for if left to be a happy and demonstrative child, happily for 20
years, eventually he will become a graceful and mannered adult. If Brandon is acting out against Mommy and
Daddy, it is because Mommy and Daddy are being
unfair or abusive with Brandon, and they deserve it. There is no such thing as a bad child, only
bad parents, and so Mom and Dad need to have 20 years of loving patience with
their son who loves them unconditionally, while they examine their own parental
ogredom at treating a 4 year old so badly.
Never, never use food as a
weapon for punishment with any person, and especially a child. Food is a sacred
need and necessity, and using food or lack of food as discipline is sadistic. Afterwards
Mom and Dad forgot their disgraceful threats and a whole new round of
underhanded insults and abuses followed with trying to get Brandon to eat his
hotdog, and trying to get Brandon to clean up his mess, and trying to get
Brandon to not scream out loud and sing and basically embarrass them in the café,
behaviors that would fill 10 more pages of this essay.
It is clearly not these poor
young parents’ faults that they are hideous people and hideous parents, for
both of their own parents on both sides were or are hideous ogres to have
raised people that could be that heartless and abusive to any person, let alone
their own 4 year old, and in front of a full café no less, without even
noticing their cruelties. I noticed that
few people made any notice of the tragic scene, and of the hateful crushing of
poor little Brandon. Imagine a world filled with you and me that survived
thousands of these scenes from our sick parents and society, and imagine a
world where we treat our children this way, to one degree or another, every
single day. We are all victims of
wounded cowards that mistreat the weak and helpless, and we have become wounded
cowards who mistreat the weak and helpless.
Imagine a world where there are millions of full grown 6’ tall 200 lbs with Brandons with muscles,
who are ragefully hateful without knowing why, and going off to war to kill
without knowing why. I think you get the
idea. Patience and Love please Mommy and
Dadddy.
See you tomorrow.
yourpersonalmuse@gmx.com
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